On Competition
One of my biggest weaknesses is that I don’t like doing things alone. Studying alone. Working out alone. Writing alone (actually writing is one of the few things that I’m ok with doing alone lol). Playing sports alone.
Over the years, I would quit a lot of things or not prepare myself adequately for other things if I were to do it alone.
I started bouldering and did so for 2+ years, but when my friends stopped going, I found it boring so I stopped.
Most of the projects I started and stopped a few days/weeks later were because I either started them alone, or my partner didn’t seem as interested as me.
On the contrary, most of my biggest wins were when I was in teams.
Staying late at work because I knew my friends/colleagues would also stay later.
The main reason why I did so well in University was that I was surrounded by friends that would always stay at school till late and on weekends. So I’d make sure to also come and study with them.
I was able to sustain 150+ days of meditation because every day, I would post on my app and would be excited to read how my friends’ meditation sessions were.
Thinking about it a bit more is that I’m someone who’s competitive by nature. I need others to push me so that I can also push myself, but what I lack is that I’m not competitive with myself.
I like becoming a better version of myself, but I don’t find it worthwhile if I’m not able to show it to others or talk about it with others.
It’s definitely a weakness of mine, but I’m not really sure how to improve on this.